I turned the blind eye for years. I knew that something wasn't quite right with my boyfriend, but we lived together so how much could he be doing that I didn't know about? Even the events that seemed strange would be written off as just that - strange.
I now think that I didn't want to see what was going on. Some of the signs were so obvious that I'm almost embarrassed to say that I let them go and continued on treating him like he was my prince. Really embarrassed. But I know that I am not the only one in history to ignore the signs, and I know I won't be the last.
While some signs are obvious, others are not so obvious. We can explain away these warning signs with a few possible explanations and so we choose the one that sits the best with us, because admitting that there might be a problem is the harder route to take.
Obvious Signs of Addiction
Stealing money - You had a few hundred bucks in your wallet and now it's gone. He tells you he doesn't know where it went and instead of continuously freaking out about it you eventually just let it go.
It sounds crazy that we would just let it go but that is what happens when we can't find a good explanation. We tell ourselves that we lost it somehow, as if it just fell out of our wallet, and we move on with our lives.
If you are missing large sums of money from your wallet or bank account, and he has access to them, then you have a huge warning sign of addiction sitting in front of you.
Spending money on nothing - This is such an obvious sign when you think about it but it is also very easy to write off.
I remember my boyfriend getting a large income tax return and having no money left a few days later. I asked him where it had gone to and he said 'here and there' with not much extra explanation. After a few weeks of continuously asking him about the money he started to make me feel guilty for hounding him about it and eventually I just gave up. I accepted that the money was gone even though he had nothing to show for it and my mind didn't think addiction was the cause even though I had reasons to believe otherwise.
His friend tells you flat-out that he has an addiction - This is another sign that I've personally dealt with. His friend left a note on my car telling me that he had spent his income tax return on drugs. The problem was that my boyfriend was so convincing that he could talk away anything. He told me that his friend was jealous of our relationship and wanted to break us up. Who do you think I believed?
I told you it was embarrassing that I ignored such obvious signs, but when you are in the relationship your feelings get in the way of facts and it can be very easy to take the route that doesn't make sense because it's easier than fighting, nagging, or worrying.
Not So Obvious Signs
He's always lying - If you constantly catch him in lies then you may just start to wonder if he has a lying problem. You can also start to wonder if he's not telling you things because he doesn't trust you and doesn't want to confide in you. In essence you can start to blame yourself for his lying.
People with addictions are amazing liars! Even when they get caught they can talk you into believing another story that they randomly make up in their head. It doesn't matter if it makes sense or not - they will make you believe it!
The truth is that if he is lying about his whereabouts or anything else then he is trying to cover something up. If he didn't have anything to hide then he wouldn't lie. Period. So if you catch him in constant lies then something is up. Take action to find out what it is or else leave him.
He doesn't look healthy - I remember constantly telling my boyfriend that he should go to the doctor. He was always sniffling and coughing and he was just not a healthy guy in general. I told him that no one should be sick for that long. He would tell me that it was just the way he was and not to worry about it.
I didn't know it but he was addicted to coke. His constant cough and 'sinus problem' was an obvious sign to anyone who had been around a coke addicted person before, but to me it was just a sign of him being really unhealthy.
Any addiction will take its toll on a body. Addiction creates worry and stress on the body and if you are not seeing the failing health signs then you will see the exhausted and irritable signs. Watch for unusual health issues or an unusual amount of stress and exhaustion on the body.
Extreme mood swings - When he can't get to his addiction then he will most likely freak out in one way or the other. This is the anxiety of withdrawal kicking in and you can bet that Jekyll and Hyde is going to show up.
I remember going on a camping trip with my boyfriend and watching him get more moody the longer we were out. He wasn't happy and I assumed that he didn't enjoy camping. The truth was it was the one time he couldn't do his drugs because we were together 24/7.
Staying awake while you are asleep - Everyone has different sleep patterns, but most people end up going to sleep between 9pm to 1am. If you find that your partner is constantly waking up in the middle of the night or not coming to bed till 3am then you may want to set the alarm and check in on what's going on.
My boyfriend took advantage of the fact that I didn't wake up during the night at all. He also took advantage of my trust. Why would I be suspicious of him staying up all hours of the night? He was always functional the next day! I trusted him and I just assumed that was the way he was.
I sure wish I would have got up one of those nights and caught him in the act. The relationship would have ended much sooner therefore ending my constant confusion about him and the relationship.
These are just a few of the signs but my advice is to be cautious of anything that doesn't seem right. A normal relationship does not consist of weird behavior, lies, or moodiness. If you find that you are confused about what is going on, like I was, then that is a sign that your man is playing with your mind and even though you know that things are weird he talks you out of seeing them for what they are.
Is Social Technology Helping or Hurting Your Relationship?
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This is a topic close to my heart, as I am married to a techie geek. I'm not insulting him - he would probably take it as a compliment, actually. And well he should. Were it not for my husband's tech prowess, I'd still be rolling paper into our old dot-matrix printer and trying to figure out the fax machine. He has succeeded in dragging his at-times technophobic wife into the 21st century, and truly, it needed to happen. This is a wave - a tsunami - that unless we get on top of, we will find ourselves drowned by.
In my practice this is especially true. Social media is a factor (if not the catalystic cause) of the issues for most of the couples I see for therapy. Whether it's a seen email, forbidden text, or controversial Facebook relationship status, social technology is rocking our world. Perhaps it's because it provides a whole new platform for connection - and rejection. Maybe it's due to the fact that one can now clandestinely pursue someone other than one's partner, aided by emails, texts, and secret passwords.
I personally think it's because the Internet holds for us the same pseudo-safety we feel in our cars when we exercise our road rage: we feel invincible, powerful, unseen and safe all at once. It's too easy to forget that behind the computer screen (or smartphone, iPad, or Blackberry screen) there are real people watching, listening, and taking note of our words, pictures, and selves. Many many real people, in fact. Just imagine: would you fill Yankee Stadium just to announce what you ate for breakfast, or how hung over you are? And yet, that's what millions - soon to be billions - do every day on the world's most popular site, Facebook. It's Warhol's 15 minutes of fame on amphetamines and the high school of your worst nightmares wrapped into one.
But it can also be a source of positive connection too. People can now keep in touch with loved ones across the globe faster, easier, and some might say even better than they ever have before at any point in history. And on a much smaller scale, dual-income marrieds can retrieve some of the intimacy of which daily life has robbed them. I know my beloved geek loves to be pinged with random texts throughout the day that let him know I'm thinking of him at that very moment. I myself like to involve him via iPhone pics in the latest havoc our 5 year-old twins have wreaked (thereby preparing him for my mood before he even steps in the door).
In my practice this is especially true. Social media is a factor (if not the catalystic cause) of the issues for most of the couples I see for therapy. Whether it's a seen email, forbidden text, or controversial Facebook relationship status, social technology is rocking our world. Perhaps it's because it provides a whole new platform for connection - and rejection. Maybe it's due to the fact that one can now clandestinely pursue someone other than one's partner, aided by emails, texts, and secret passwords.
I personally think it's because the Internet holds for us the same pseudo-safety we feel in our cars when we exercise our road rage: we feel invincible, powerful, unseen and safe all at once. It's too easy to forget that behind the computer screen (or smartphone, iPad, or Blackberry screen) there are real people watching, listening, and taking note of our words, pictures, and selves. Many many real people, in fact. Just imagine: would you fill Yankee Stadium just to announce what you ate for breakfast, or how hung over you are? And yet, that's what millions - soon to be billions - do every day on the world's most popular site, Facebook. It's Warhol's 15 minutes of fame on amphetamines and the high school of your worst nightmares wrapped into one.
But it can also be a source of positive connection too. People can now keep in touch with loved ones across the globe faster, easier, and some might say even better than they ever have before at any point in history. And on a much smaller scale, dual-income marrieds can retrieve some of the intimacy of which daily life has robbed them. I know my beloved geek loves to be pinged with random texts throughout the day that let him know I'm thinking of him at that very moment. I myself like to involve him via iPhone pics in the latest havoc our 5 year-old twins have wreaked (thereby preparing him for my mood before he even steps in the door).
How to Talk to Men (in a Way That They Like!)
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Not only is it okay to talk about yourself to men, but it is 100% essential to getting first dates and future dates. When I tell women that it’s GOOD to talk about themselves, it’s generally met with complete shock. But don’t guys love it when we let them do all the talking?
Well, yes. Who doesn’t like talking about themselves? But unless “good listener” is on the top of his must-have list for potential mates – and I’ve never met a man who places it there – he’s not going to pick you. Imagine him driving home and saying to himself, “That Susie was such a good listener. I can’t wait to see her again!” The only guy who does that is the me-me-me-me guy. And who wants him, anyway?
When you meet a man you like, I want him driving home saying to himself, “That Susie is so interesting/fun to be with/positive/thoughtful/clever…and we both like (fill-in-the-blank). I can’t wait to see her again!” He can not do this unless you give him the information to form the opinion, right?
If you’re one of the many women for whom this does not come naturally, I have three things you can do to start developing the skill of creating conversation that gets you dates.
1. Know yourself.
Here’s a pop-quiz: name five things about yourself that you think men would think are impressive, interesting or just plain lovely.
Go on…I’ll wait.
You see, most women can’t do this. In fact most women are convinced they don’t have five special things about them. That’s just nonsense. You needn’t have cured a disease or saved someone’s life to have bragging rights. I guarantee you that 99% of the men you meet haven’t scaled Mt. Rushmore and don’t speak seven languages. Just like them, there is a multitude of things that make you unique and attractive…to the right guy. So get to work on figuring out what they are so you can talk about it!
2. Speak in headlines; not stories.
Your story will attract the right guy; you just have to know how to tell it. Among the top complaints men have about us gorgeous beings is that we talk too much. Can you believe it?
Men’s brains are wired differently than ours. Information comes in and is processed in a straight line, and they stay focused on the end of that line. What is the result or, in the case of conversation with us, the point?
When men are out scouting prey (Yeah, that’s us!) here’s what they do: is it there? No. Is it there? No. Is it there? No. And they repeat this until they find it and conquer it. Here is what a man DOES NOT do: is it there? No…but, oh look…there is a really pretty tree!
This is why our yappity-yap can absolutely drive them insane and, out of self-preservation, they turn off. So when you’re sharing about yourself – especially when you first meet – short, simple accounts do the trick. I’m learning how to swing dance. I love the music and it’s great exercise. I volunteer at the local animal shelter walking dogs, but cats are really my favorite. Last year I went to Italy, drank wine and ate like a fiend. I’m dying to go back. Start off like that and save the details for the girls. (Or for when he’s a lifetime captive audience and he has no choice!)
3. Manage the conversation.
That brain difference thing gives us a definite leg up when it comes to conversation. When conversation lags or it goes in a whacky direction, it’s our job to keep it going. Don’t complain, sister; just do it. Why? Because we’re better at it!
I’ve seen more dates go awry simply because the conversation went off on some negative tangent, some question was asked that was out of place (the typical “why haven’t you been married yet” comes to mind), or someone simply hogs it. When this happens, you may both end up with the idea that it wasn’t a match.
In fact, a little conversation management can completely change the course of a date, not to mention a relationship. With some practice you can learn to move a conversation along and keep it positive and balanced.
If he is talking too much, it’s okay to interrupt with a smooth transition to a headline of your own. He’ll likely appreciate it and listen. (You may have saved him from himself.) If the conversation goes negative (as it often will if you talk divorce, illness, bad dates, or bad jobs), you can politely acknowledge it and segue to another, more positive, direction.
So often we only have a short time to learn about one another, and when this doesn’t happen it results in a lot of dates that go nowhere. When you master conversation with men, you have the power to make every meeting or date the best it can possibly be. So start practicing and have fun!
Well, yes. Who doesn’t like talking about themselves? But unless “good listener” is on the top of his must-have list for potential mates – and I’ve never met a man who places it there – he’s not going to pick you. Imagine him driving home and saying to himself, “That Susie was such a good listener. I can’t wait to see her again!” The only guy who does that is the me-me-me-me guy. And who wants him, anyway?
When you meet a man you like, I want him driving home saying to himself, “That Susie is so interesting/fun to be with/positive/thoughtful/clever…and we both like (fill-in-the-blank). I can’t wait to see her again!” He can not do this unless you give him the information to form the opinion, right?
If you’re one of the many women for whom this does not come naturally, I have three things you can do to start developing the skill of creating conversation that gets you dates.
1. Know yourself.
Here’s a pop-quiz: name five things about yourself that you think men would think are impressive, interesting or just plain lovely.
Go on…I’ll wait.
You see, most women can’t do this. In fact most women are convinced they don’t have five special things about them. That’s just nonsense. You needn’t have cured a disease or saved someone’s life to have bragging rights. I guarantee you that 99% of the men you meet haven’t scaled Mt. Rushmore and don’t speak seven languages. Just like them, there is a multitude of things that make you unique and attractive…to the right guy. So get to work on figuring out what they are so you can talk about it!
2. Speak in headlines; not stories.
Your story will attract the right guy; you just have to know how to tell it. Among the top complaints men have about us gorgeous beings is that we talk too much. Can you believe it?
Men’s brains are wired differently than ours. Information comes in and is processed in a straight line, and they stay focused on the end of that line. What is the result or, in the case of conversation with us, the point?
When men are out scouting prey (Yeah, that’s us!) here’s what they do: is it there? No. Is it there? No. Is it there? No. And they repeat this until they find it and conquer it. Here is what a man DOES NOT do: is it there? No…but, oh look…there is a really pretty tree!
This is why our yappity-yap can absolutely drive them insane and, out of self-preservation, they turn off. So when you’re sharing about yourself – especially when you first meet – short, simple accounts do the trick. I’m learning how to swing dance. I love the music and it’s great exercise. I volunteer at the local animal shelter walking dogs, but cats are really my favorite. Last year I went to Italy, drank wine and ate like a fiend. I’m dying to go back. Start off like that and save the details for the girls. (Or for when he’s a lifetime captive audience and he has no choice!)
3. Manage the conversation.
That brain difference thing gives us a definite leg up when it comes to conversation. When conversation lags or it goes in a whacky direction, it’s our job to keep it going. Don’t complain, sister; just do it. Why? Because we’re better at it!
I’ve seen more dates go awry simply because the conversation went off on some negative tangent, some question was asked that was out of place (the typical “why haven’t you been married yet” comes to mind), or someone simply hogs it. When this happens, you may both end up with the idea that it wasn’t a match.
In fact, a little conversation management can completely change the course of a date, not to mention a relationship. With some practice you can learn to move a conversation along and keep it positive and balanced.
If he is talking too much, it’s okay to interrupt with a smooth transition to a headline of your own. He’ll likely appreciate it and listen. (You may have saved him from himself.) If the conversation goes negative (as it often will if you talk divorce, illness, bad dates, or bad jobs), you can politely acknowledge it and segue to another, more positive, direction.
So often we only have a short time to learn about one another, and when this doesn’t happen it results in a lot of dates that go nowhere. When you master conversation with men, you have the power to make every meeting or date the best it can possibly be. So start practicing and have fun!
Do You Want Your Girlfriend Back? Discover 2 Ways You Can Get Her Back Here!
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If you're reading this, I'm assuming it's safe for me to say you've hit a rough patch and now you want your girlfriend back into your life. Whatever you do after a breakup can influence whether you can get your ex back or not.
Try these 2 methods if you want to increase your chances of getting her back. If you haven't already done so, apply the no contact rule and your chances of getting her back will greatly increase.
Do You Want Girlfriend Back? Apply the No Contact Rule right NOW
Your ex girlfriend needs time and space away from you to figure out what she wants in her own life. No more phone calls, text messages, emails and the "accidentally" running into her. Reaching out to your ex will just push her away. Don't contact her when she doesn't want you to. Signs of her not wanting to hear from you is when she chooses to ignore your messages and doesn't respond to any of your attempts. When you constantly call or message her, you are just telling her that you don't care about what she wants and that will make matters worse for you.
By reaching out to her in your state of mind, you're behaving out of desperation, which is not good at all. Ultimately, the more you reach out to your ex, the more desperate you look and the more you will repel her away out of your life for good.
Do You Want Girlfriend Back? Improve Yourself to Attract Her Back
The only way to get your girlfriend back is by attracting her. If you're applying the No Contact rule, you're taking extra measures to get her back. But work on your self-improvement during that time you aren't contacting your ex. It is difficult to be attractive since breakups can really damage your self-esteem and confidence. This is why working on yourself will increase your chances of getting her back because you're working on your self confidence along the way.
Several people put old relationships, hobbies, and interest on the back burner while they're in a relationship. Spend time on those things now. Restore your connection with old friends and family you've lost touch with since your relationship. You can either have a new hobby or do things you enjoy but never had time for until now. You'll start to feel better about yourself and before you know it, you will regain your confidence.
You're at a much better state to attract your ex if you want your ex girlfriend back with the no contact rule and personal development. When you have the mindset ready to get her back, you'll become that person she initially was attracted to in the first place.
If you want your ex girlfriend back, the first time you connect with her (after a month of no contact) should be casual and friendly. Avoid bringing up your relationship. Since it will be a new relationship, you'll have to treat it as a new relationship. Again, begin to date her and begin your new relationship on a new slate. Remember, you want to treat this second time around as a new relationship, otherwise you'll end up going down the same road that led you both to a breakup.
Try these 2 methods if you want to increase your chances of getting her back. If you haven't already done so, apply the no contact rule and your chances of getting her back will greatly increase.
Do You Want Girlfriend Back? Apply the No Contact Rule right NOW
Your ex girlfriend needs time and space away from you to figure out what she wants in her own life. No more phone calls, text messages, emails and the "accidentally" running into her. Reaching out to your ex will just push her away. Don't contact her when she doesn't want you to. Signs of her not wanting to hear from you is when she chooses to ignore your messages and doesn't respond to any of your attempts. When you constantly call or message her, you are just telling her that you don't care about what she wants and that will make matters worse for you.
By reaching out to her in your state of mind, you're behaving out of desperation, which is not good at all. Ultimately, the more you reach out to your ex, the more desperate you look and the more you will repel her away out of your life for good.
Do You Want Girlfriend Back? Improve Yourself to Attract Her Back
The only way to get your girlfriend back is by attracting her. If you're applying the No Contact rule, you're taking extra measures to get her back. But work on your self-improvement during that time you aren't contacting your ex. It is difficult to be attractive since breakups can really damage your self-esteem and confidence. This is why working on yourself will increase your chances of getting her back because you're working on your self confidence along the way.
Several people put old relationships, hobbies, and interest on the back burner while they're in a relationship. Spend time on those things now. Restore your connection with old friends and family you've lost touch with since your relationship. You can either have a new hobby or do things you enjoy but never had time for until now. You'll start to feel better about yourself and before you know it, you will regain your confidence.
You're at a much better state to attract your ex if you want your ex girlfriend back with the no contact rule and personal development. When you have the mindset ready to get her back, you'll become that person she initially was attracted to in the first place.
If you want your ex girlfriend back, the first time you connect with her (after a month of no contact) should be casual and friendly. Avoid bringing up your relationship. Since it will be a new relationship, you'll have to treat it as a new relationship. Again, begin to date her and begin your new relationship on a new slate. Remember, you want to treat this second time around as a new relationship, otherwise you'll end up going down the same road that led you both to a breakup.
How To Make Your Ex Boyfriend Want You Back-3 Mistakes To Avoid
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Are you trying to get your ex to listen or respond after you've text messaged him, sent him an email, and even tried to visit him at work? If so, you're probably frustrated right now and want to know how to make your ex boyfriend want you back. Break ups are difficult to deal with, but if you want to know how to get him back-- keep on reading.
How to Make Your Ex Boyfriend Want You Back: Don't Contact Him
In regards to getting an ex back, you've made the greatest mistake of all if you're disappointed that your ex won't talk to you.
You've contacted your ex.
Understand that you have no control over your ex's feelings or thoughts. There is no use trying to persuade your ex to take you back. Basically, you're trying to "convince" him to take you back when you contact him all the time. The only person whose feelings you can control is YOURSELF. The more you try to get some sort of response from him, the more you will ruin your chances of getting him back.
How to Make Your Ex Boyfriend Want You Back: Don't Demand For His Attention
By trying to talk to him or be “friends” with him, you will just push him further away from you. I know you're feeling desperate and scared that he may move on with his life. It's terrifying to know that someone you love, may move on with their life without you-- this is a huge sign that you're not in the right state of mind to attract him.
Suffering from a breakup can entirely erase all of your self-esteem and self-confidence. By not having the confidence you need to live life without your ex, you'll be ruining your chances of getting him back.
Do you know that you are a gorgeous and beautiful person? If not, you need to rediscover your self worth and love again. Try to go out and enjoy life. Try to reconnect with your friends and family. Do a social activity at least once in every week. Join a new class or start a new hobby. In other words, go out and learn to live life without your ex. This will help you build confidence and help you realize you can live life without him.
You'll be in better condition of attracting him back by working your self-improvement. He used to be attracted to you until negative emotions from stress depleted your self-love and confidence. Harmful emotions from stress can gradually deteriorate your relationship. Become that woman he used to be crazy for by increasing your self-worth and love.
How to Make Your Ex Boyfriend Want You Back: Take Action
A lot of people undergoing a breakup tend to focus on their pain and sorrow. If this is how you feel, do you like feeling sad? The answer is clearly no. When you decide to focus on your pain, you dwell on more of your own pain and misery.
When you focus on what you want in your life, you're focusing on living a better and happier life. With positive focusing, you are living life with a goal in mind. Instead of focusing on the emotions you're going through, focus on what you can do to make yourself feel better. This will help you take the necessary actions you need overcome this tough part in your life.
Right now, you're probably feeling as if you're in the “depths of despair.” You need to snap out of this negative mindset and take initiative to make yourself feel better. This is the very first step to healing yourself from a breakup. Once you begin healing yourself, you're in a much better state of attracting what you want in your life.
How to Make Your Ex Boyfriend Want You Back: Don't Contact Him
In regards to getting an ex back, you've made the greatest mistake of all if you're disappointed that your ex won't talk to you.
You've contacted your ex.
Understand that you have no control over your ex's feelings or thoughts. There is no use trying to persuade your ex to take you back. Basically, you're trying to "convince" him to take you back when you contact him all the time. The only person whose feelings you can control is YOURSELF. The more you try to get some sort of response from him, the more you will ruin your chances of getting him back.
How to Make Your Ex Boyfriend Want You Back: Don't Demand For His Attention
By trying to talk to him or be “friends” with him, you will just push him further away from you. I know you're feeling desperate and scared that he may move on with his life. It's terrifying to know that someone you love, may move on with their life without you-- this is a huge sign that you're not in the right state of mind to attract him.
Suffering from a breakup can entirely erase all of your self-esteem and self-confidence. By not having the confidence you need to live life without your ex, you'll be ruining your chances of getting him back.
Do you know that you are a gorgeous and beautiful person? If not, you need to rediscover your self worth and love again. Try to go out and enjoy life. Try to reconnect with your friends and family. Do a social activity at least once in every week. Join a new class or start a new hobby. In other words, go out and learn to live life without your ex. This will help you build confidence and help you realize you can live life without him.
You'll be in better condition of attracting him back by working your self-improvement. He used to be attracted to you until negative emotions from stress depleted your self-love and confidence. Harmful emotions from stress can gradually deteriorate your relationship. Become that woman he used to be crazy for by increasing your self-worth and love.
How to Make Your Ex Boyfriend Want You Back: Take Action
A lot of people undergoing a breakup tend to focus on their pain and sorrow. If this is how you feel, do you like feeling sad? The answer is clearly no. When you decide to focus on your pain, you dwell on more of your own pain and misery.
When you focus on what you want in your life, you're focusing on living a better and happier life. With positive focusing, you are living life with a goal in mind. Instead of focusing on the emotions you're going through, focus on what you can do to make yourself feel better. This will help you take the necessary actions you need overcome this tough part in your life.
Right now, you're probably feeling as if you're in the “depths of despair.” You need to snap out of this negative mindset and take initiative to make yourself feel better. This is the very first step to healing yourself from a breakup. Once you begin healing yourself, you're in a much better state of attracting what you want in your life.
Cheaters guide to get back with your ex girlfriend.
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Ok, you cheated on your girlfriend and now want to know how to get back with your ex girlfriend... She probably won't have anything to do with you, right? Maybe you have had some time to think it over and now know how big of a mistake you made. What can you do now? All is not lost, you still have a good chance to get get your ex back. You must act now; the longer you wait, the more difficult it will be to get back with your ex girlfriend.
There are a couple of things you need to get your girlfriend back: determination (the willingness and desire to do what it takes to get her back), and patience.
Relationships can be too easily broken up, but it may take a little time to repair. You are already putting more effort into repairing your relationship than most people do. You will get back with your ex girlfriend if you don't give up on her.
Now, since you cheated on her, I'm assuming that she may not want to talk to you. So, you need to find a way to get your ex to talk to you again....
First of all, make sure your heart is in the right place. If you are truly in love with this gal, you will know it in your heart. Chances are, your ex girlfriend has similar feelings about you, but she is probably questioning the relationship right now. How can you make her realize those feelings again?
Here are several great ways to get your ex girlfriend back thinking about you:
Write her a handwritten letter. Take some time, think only of her, add a short apology, and move on to reminding her of how it felt when the two of you were together. Keep it simple! Don't bring up any negative thoughts. Always stay positive. If she broke up with you, mention that you understand and accept the break up. Let her know that you would have done the same thing.
Taking it slow and starting over as friends is the best way to get back with your ex girlfriend. Most times this is going to be your best bet. Keep sending her notes and letters. They don't have to be long, 3-4 sentences can be very flattering to a gal that is questioning her love for you. Suggest that you start over and get to know each other better. Don't ask her to put her trust in you yet. Instead let her know that you wish to earn her trust back. Starting out as friends is a great way to do just this.
A small, inexpensive gift can go a long way. You should know what your girl likes. If not, think about it for awhile, ask her friends and relatives if you have to. Show her you love her by giving her a gift that she would really like. Showing her that you pay attention to what she likes is a sure fire way to get back with your ex girlfriend by touching her heart. Leave a note on the gift to really add some extra charm to it.
Leave your phone number for her near the bottom of your letters and notes. help her want to call you.Your conversation will be much sweeter when you let her decide to call you.... she won't call you unless she wants to give you a second chance. Once she calls you, make sure you take it slow. Moving too fast can often scare her away, killing your chances of getting your ex back.
Don't get discouraged. Remember that Perseverance and patience are two important things to get back with your ex girlfriend.
There are a couple of things you need to get your girlfriend back: determination (the willingness and desire to do what it takes to get her back), and patience.
Relationships can be too easily broken up, but it may take a little time to repair. You are already putting more effort into repairing your relationship than most people do. You will get back with your ex girlfriend if you don't give up on her.Now, since you cheated on her, I'm assuming that she may not want to talk to you. So, you need to find a way to get your ex to talk to you again....
First of all, make sure your heart is in the right place. If you are truly in love with this gal, you will know it in your heart. Chances are, your ex girlfriend has similar feelings about you, but she is probably questioning the relationship right now. How can you make her realize those feelings again?
Here are several great ways to get your ex girlfriend back thinking about you:
Write her a handwritten letter. Take some time, think only of her, add a short apology, and move on to reminding her of how it felt when the two of you were together. Keep it simple! Don't bring up any negative thoughts. Always stay positive. If she broke up with you, mention that you understand and accept the break up. Let her know that you would have done the same thing.
Taking it slow and starting over as friends is the best way to get back with your ex girlfriend. Most times this is going to be your best bet. Keep sending her notes and letters. They don't have to be long, 3-4 sentences can be very flattering to a gal that is questioning her love for you. Suggest that you start over and get to know each other better. Don't ask her to put her trust in you yet. Instead let her know that you wish to earn her trust back. Starting out as friends is a great way to do just this.
A small, inexpensive gift can go a long way. You should know what your girl likes. If not, think about it for awhile, ask her friends and relatives if you have to. Show her you love her by giving her a gift that she would really like. Showing her that you pay attention to what she likes is a sure fire way to get back with your ex girlfriend by touching her heart. Leave a note on the gift to really add some extra charm to it.
Leave your phone number for her near the bottom of your letters and notes. help her want to call you.Your conversation will be much sweeter when you let her decide to call you.... she won't call you unless she wants to give you a second chance. Once she calls you, make sure you take it slow. Moving too fast can often scare her away, killing your chances of getting your ex back.
Don't get discouraged. Remember that Perseverance and patience are two important things to get back with your ex girlfriend.
Love Article: What a girl wish in a relationship
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What a girl wish in a relationship? What do women wish from a marriage? These are the questions of most lovers, If any man knows the answer to these questions and act by it, he would get a happy and loyal partner in return, for sure.
Women wish Men to understand them: Many women would want their men to read their mind. But unfortunately most men are not good mind readers. So guys looking to win the love of girl should develop a good communication with her and be a good listener when she talks. Try to get to know her passions, interests, hobbies and other things about her. A woman looks for appreciation and support from her partner.
Women wish Men to be Honest to them: Women expect honesty from their man. A woman can’t stand lies and infidelity from a partner. Women are often good with their intuitions and can find if the man is cheating. Cheating can ruin any relationship and it is difficult to build trust in the partner again. On the other hand, if you are loyal and honest to your partner it would make her feel secured and relaxed.
Women wish men to Love them: Women want to know and feel that they are loved. Shower your love on your women by way of Gifts, comforts and gestures. Add good sex and romance to it and you would get her loyalty and devotion instead.
Women wish men to respect them:Women would not want men to call them names or beat them or treat like a door mat. Women want their men to how them through actions that you respect their opinions, careers, interests, friends, bodies and minds.
Women wish their men to be committed to them: Women do not want their men taking them for a ride or taken as granted. Majority of women look for Very some sort of commitment in a relationship. No woman likes being taken for a ride. If you are a man who is willing to take a step towards commitment then that would make your women very happy.
As the saying goes ‘What you give is what you get’. If you want your partner to treat you well then you should treat her well too.
In short, treat your women the way you want yourself to be treated. If you want a good wife then you should be a good husband.
Women wish Men to understand them: Many women would want their men to read their mind. But unfortunately most men are not good mind readers. So guys looking to win the love of girl should develop a good communication with her and be a good listener when she talks. Try to get to know her passions, interests, hobbies and other things about her. A woman looks for appreciation and support from her partner.Women wish Men to be Honest to them: Women expect honesty from their man. A woman can’t stand lies and infidelity from a partner. Women are often good with their intuitions and can find if the man is cheating. Cheating can ruin any relationship and it is difficult to build trust in the partner again. On the other hand, if you are loyal and honest to your partner it would make her feel secured and relaxed.
Women wish men to Love them: Women want to know and feel that they are loved. Shower your love on your women by way of Gifts, comforts and gestures. Add good sex and romance to it and you would get her loyalty and devotion instead.
Women wish men to respect them:Women would not want men to call them names or beat them or treat like a door mat. Women want their men to how them through actions that you respect their opinions, careers, interests, friends, bodies and minds.
Women wish their men to be committed to them: Women do not want their men taking them for a ride or taken as granted. Majority of women look for Very some sort of commitment in a relationship. No woman likes being taken for a ride. If you are a man who is willing to take a step towards commitment then that would make your women very happy.
As the saying goes ‘What you give is what you get’. If you want your partner to treat you well then you should treat her well too.
In short, treat your women the way you want yourself to be treated. If you want a good wife then you should be a good husband.
Dating Article: 40 Tips to melt a woman heart
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Here are some beautiful tips for the lovers to melt the heart of their partner or love to make their relation and love more strong. These tips would help you to make your love more powerful and leads to happy and successful love life.1. Ask her to dance.
2. On windy days, brush wayward strands of hair from her eyes and mouth.
3. When she’s coming down the street, across the room, or up the stairs to meet you, walk towards her as soon as you see her.
4. Kiss her between her shoulder blades when she turns her back to you to go to sleep.
5. Put your arm around her when you introduce her to your friends and family.
6. Grasp her hand when a scantily dressed, beautiful woman walks by.
7. Call her when you’re feeling sad.
8. Kiss her eyelids.
9. Ask to see a picture of her when she was a child.
10. Wash her from head to toe in the shower.
11. If she’s crying on the phone, go over to her place. Immediately.
13. Occasionally call her by her first and middle names.
14. Buy her your favourite rock album of all time on vinyl.
15. Order coffee for her, remembering exactly how she likes it.
16. Undress her and put her to bed when she falls asleep in the car.
17. Mention your upcoming anniversary before she does.
18. Send her something in the mail. Anything!
19. When she’s feeling insecure, stare into her eyes and tell her there is no-one in the world who could be as right for you as she is.
20. Call her just before you get on the plane.
21. Pick her clothes up off the floor.
22. Try desperately to make her laugh when she’s feeling down.
23. Take her to see your favourite sport live. Pay more attention to her than to the game.
24. Touch her arm when you leave the table to go to the bathroom. Touch her again when you come back.
25. Shave just before you see her. She’ll notice.
26. Hug her when she gets jealous. Hug her hard.
27. Worship her breasts.
28. Give her jewellery.
29. Hand her two towels when she gets out of the shower. (The second one is for her hair.)
30. Ask her specific questions about her work.
31. Keep her favourite cereal on hand.
32. In the middle of a conversation, tell her you love her.
33. Send her very expensive flowers when you screw up.
34. Take her to a cabin with a fireplace. Build her a fire.
35. Moan her name when she goes down on you.
36. Read her a story when it’s her turn to drive during a long road trip.
37. Offer to fix something at her place that you realise is broken.
38. Notice when she’s wearing something new.
39. Make love to her standing up, against a wall.
40. Kiss her hand in front of your most die-hard bachelor buddies.
Read the tips again & again and try to be practicle. These tips surely enhance love in your love or partner. Women only need love, these are the ways she feels your love. Just show her love and win her heart.
Love and Time
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Once upon a time, there was an island where all the feelings lived: Happiness, Sadness, knowledge, and all of the others, including Love. One day it was announced to the feelings that the island would sink, so all constructed their boats and left the island, except Love.
Love was the only one who stayed. Love wanted to hold out until the last possible moment.
When the island had almost sunk, Love decided to ask for help.
Richness was passing by Love in a grand boat. Love said,
“Richness, can you take me with you?”
Richness answered, “No, I can’t. There is a lot of gold and silver in my boat. There is no place here for you.”
Love decided to ask Vanity who was also passing by in a beautiful vessel. “Vanity, please help me!”
“I can’t help you, Love. You are all wet and might damage my boat,” Vanity answered.
Sadness was close by so Love asked, “Sadness, let me go with you.”
“Oh . . . Love, I am so sad that I need to be by myself!”
Happiness passed by Love, too, but she was so happy that she did not even hear when Love called her.
Suddenly, there was a voice, “Come, Love, I will take you.” It was an elder. So blessed and overjoyed, Love even forgot to ask the elder where they were going. When they arrived at dry land, the elder went her own way. Realizing how much was owed the elder,
Love asked Knowledge, another elder, “Who helped me?”
“It was Time,” Knowledge answered.
“Time?” asked Love. “But why did Time help me?”
Knowledge smiled with deep wisdom and answered, “Because only Time is capable of understanding how valuable Love is.”
Love was the only one who stayed. Love wanted to hold out until the last possible moment.
When the island had almost sunk, Love decided to ask for help.
Richness was passing by Love in a grand boat. Love said,
“Richness, can you take me with you?”
Richness answered, “No, I can’t. There is a lot of gold and silver in my boat. There is no place here for you.”
Love decided to ask Vanity who was also passing by in a beautiful vessel. “Vanity, please help me!”
“I can’t help you, Love. You are all wet and might damage my boat,” Vanity answered.
Sadness was close by so Love asked, “Sadness, let me go with you.”
“Oh . . . Love, I am so sad that I need to be by myself!”
Happiness passed by Love, too, but she was so happy that she did not even hear when Love called her.
Suddenly, there was a voice, “Come, Love, I will take you.” It was an elder. So blessed and overjoyed, Love even forgot to ask the elder where they were going. When they arrived at dry land, the elder went her own way. Realizing how much was owed the elder,
Love asked Knowledge, another elder, “Who helped me?”
“It was Time,” Knowledge answered.
“Time?” asked Love. “But why did Time help me?”
Knowledge smiled with deep wisdom and answered, “Because only Time is capable of understanding how valuable Love is.”
PAINFULL REGRET – Silent Love
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10th grade:
As I sat there in English class, I stared at the girl next to me. She was my so called “best friend”. I stared at her long, silky hair, and wished she was mine. But she didn’t notice me like that, and I knew it.
After class, she walked up to me and asked me for the notes she had missed the day before and handed them to her. She said “thanks” and shake hand with me. I wanted to tell her, I want her to know that I don’t want to be just friends, I love her but I’m just too shy, and I don’t know why.
11th grade
The phone rang. On the other end, it was her. She was in tears, mumbling on and on about how her love had broke her heart. She asked me to come over because she didn’t want to be alone, so I did. As I sat next to her on the sofa, I stared at her soft eyes, wishing she was mine.
After 2 hours, one Drew Barrymore movie, and three bags of chips, she decided to go to sleep.
She looked at me, said “thanks” and gave me sweet smile. I want to tell her, I want her to know that I don’t want to be just friends, I love her but I’m just too shy, and I don’t know why.
Senior year
The day before prom she walked to my locker. “My date is sick” she said; he’s not going to go well, I didn’t have a date, and in 7th grade, we made a promise that if neither of us had dates, we would go together just as “best friends”. So we did.
Prom night, after everything was over, I was standing at her front door step! I stared at her as she smiled at me and stared at me with her crystal eyes. I want her to be mine, but she isn’t think of me like that, and I know it. Then she said “I had the best time, thanks!” and gave me a sweet smile. I want to tell her, I want her to know that I don’t want to be just friends, I love her but I’m just too shy, and I don’t know why.
Graduation Day
A day passed, then a week, then a month. Before I could blink, it was graduation day. I watched as her perfect body floated like an angel up on stage to get her diploma. I wanted her to be mine, but she didn’t notice me like that, and I knew it.
Before everyone went home, she came to me in her smock and hat, and cried as I hugged her. Then she lifted her head from my shoulder and said, “You’re my best friend, thanks”. I want to tell her, I want her to know that I don’t want to be just friends, I love her but I’m just too shy, and I don’t know why.
A Few Years Later
Now I sit in the pews of the church. That girl is getting married now. I watched her say “I do” and drive off to her new life, married to another man. I wanted her to be mine, but she didn`t see me like that, and I knew it.
But before she drove away, she came to me and said “you came!”. She said “thanks” and kissed me on the cheek. I want to tell her, I want her to know that I don’t want to be just friends, I love her but I’m just too shy, and I don’t know why.
Funeral
Years passed, I looked down at the coffin of a girl who used to be my “best friend”. At the service, they read a diary entry she had wrote in her high school years.
I wish I did too… I thought to my self, and I cried.
As I sat there in English class, I stared at the girl next to me. She was my so called “best friend”. I stared at her long, silky hair, and wished she was mine. But she didn’t notice me like that, and I knew it.
After class, she walked up to me and asked me for the notes she had missed the day before and handed them to her. She said “thanks” and shake hand with me. I wanted to tell her, I want her to know that I don’t want to be just friends, I love her but I’m just too shy, and I don’t know why.
11th grade
The phone rang. On the other end, it was her. She was in tears, mumbling on and on about how her love had broke her heart. She asked me to come over because she didn’t want to be alone, so I did. As I sat next to her on the sofa, I stared at her soft eyes, wishing she was mine.
After 2 hours, one Drew Barrymore movie, and three bags of chips, she decided to go to sleep.
She looked at me, said “thanks” and gave me sweet smile. I want to tell her, I want her to know that I don’t want to be just friends, I love her but I’m just too shy, and I don’t know why.
Senior year
The day before prom she walked to my locker. “My date is sick” she said; he’s not going to go well, I didn’t have a date, and in 7th grade, we made a promise that if neither of us had dates, we would go together just as “best friends”. So we did.
Prom night, after everything was over, I was standing at her front door step! I stared at her as she smiled at me and stared at me with her crystal eyes. I want her to be mine, but she isn’t think of me like that, and I know it. Then she said “I had the best time, thanks!” and gave me a sweet smile. I want to tell her, I want her to know that I don’t want to be just friends, I love her but I’m just too shy, and I don’t know why.
Graduation Day
A day passed, then a week, then a month. Before I could blink, it was graduation day. I watched as her perfect body floated like an angel up on stage to get her diploma. I wanted her to be mine, but she didn’t notice me like that, and I knew it.
Before everyone went home, she came to me in her smock and hat, and cried as I hugged her. Then she lifted her head from my shoulder and said, “You’re my best friend, thanks”. I want to tell her, I want her to know that I don’t want to be just friends, I love her but I’m just too shy, and I don’t know why.
A Few Years Later
Now I sit in the pews of the church. That girl is getting married now. I watched her say “I do” and drive off to her new life, married to another man. I wanted her to be mine, but she didn`t see me like that, and I knew it.
But before she drove away, she came to me and said “you came!”. She said “thanks” and kissed me on the cheek. I want to tell her, I want her to know that I don’t want to be just friends, I love her but I’m just too shy, and I don’t know why.
Funeral
Years passed, I looked down at the coffin of a girl who used to be my “best friend”. At the service, they read a diary entry she had wrote in her high school years.
This is what it read:
I stare at him wishing he was mine, but he doesn’t notice me like that, and I know it. I want to tell him, I want him to know that I don’t want to be just friends, I love him but I’m just too shy, and I don’t know why. I wish he would tell me he loved me!I wish I did too… I thought to my self, and I cried.